collecting samples 

When I got home from work one day, I went to let the dogs out of their crates. I noticed that Cooper had wedged himself into the back of the crate on top of the bedding. The rest of the crate floor had a puddle of urine.

This was pretty unusual for Cooper. He’s usually quite neat and tidy about his eliminations. I couldn’t remember ever having to clean up after him. The little bitch beside him was a different story but Lulu was in a separate crate.

It happened again a day later. This time Pam called the vet to see if something was going on with Cooper.

The vet’s office said that they needed a urine sample. “Hmmm”, I thought. “How do I collect a urine sample?”

The answer was quite simple. All we needed was to wash out an empty pill bottle and put the urine in that. Washing out pill bottles wasn’t my concern. Getting Cooper’s urine inside the bottle seemed more problematic.

The first thought, quickly dismissed, was to try to get the bottle in line with Cooper’s urine stream. The reason that this was so quickly dismissed is that I immediately visualized my hand being covered with far more urine than what got in the bottle.

Then I remembered how the vet once collected a sample while we were at his office. He got a soup ladle and strategically put it under Cooper while Cooper was providing a sample.

My next thought was that I probably shouldn’t use one of our current ladles. If I used one of those, there was a chance that it would get back in the kitchen. <shudder>

Pam bought a cheap ladle that would never be confused with any of the kitchen ladles. We planned on throwing it away after we’d used it.

I let Cooper out into the back yard to take care of business. I discreetly followed him with the temporary ladle. He was slightly suspicious of me following him, he kept looking at me over his shoulder, but he didn’t run off and he stopped to provide a sample. I deftly got the ladle into position and got the sample.

Getting the sample from the ladle to the pill bottle was a challenge but I managed to do that without getting any of it on me. I sealed up the bottle and left it in the garage for Pam to take to the vet.
I left the ladle in the back yard. It’s still there.

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